On carpe diem..............................

    
      Clearly, Carpe Diem doesn't work for me.  I can't even carpe fifteen minutes in a row, so the whole damn day is out of the question.
      Here's what does work for me.
      There are two different types of time.  Chronos time is what we live in.  It's regular time.  It's one minute at a time, staring down the clock until bedtime time.  It's ten excruciating minutes in the Target line time, four screaming minutes in time-out time, two hours until Daddy gets home time.  Chronos is the hard, slow-passing time we parents often live in.
      Then there's Kairos time.  Kairos is God's time.  It's time outside of time.  It's metaphysical time.  Kairos is those magical moments in which time stands still.  I have a few of those moments each day, and I cherish them.
      Like when I actually stop what I'm doing a really look at Tish.  I notice how perfectly smooth and brownish her skin is.  I notice the curves of her teeny elf mouth and her almond brown eyes, and I breathe in her soft Tishy smell.  In these moments, I see that her mouth is moving, but I can't here here because all I can think is:  This is the first time I've really seen Tish all day, and my God - she is so beautiful.  Kairos.
      Or when I'm stuck in Chronos time in the grocery line and I'm haggard and angry at the slow checkout clerk.  But then I look at my cart and I'm transported out of Chronos.  I notice the piles of healthy food I'll feed  my children to grow the bodies and minds, and I remember that most of the world's mamas would kill for this opportunity.  This chance to stand in a grocery line with enough money to pay.  And I just stare at my cart.  At the abundance.  The bounty.  Thank you, God.  Kairos.
     Or when I curl up in my cozy bed with my dog, Theo, asleep at my feet and Craig asleep at my side, and I listen to both of them breathing.  And for a moment I think, How did a girl like me get so lucky?  To go to bed each night surrounded by this breath, this love, this peace, this warmth?  Kairos.
      These Kairos moments leave as fast as they come, but I mark them.  I say the work Kairos in my head each time I leave Chronos.  And at the end of the day, I don't remember exactly what my Kairos moments were, but I remember I had them.  That makes the pain of the daily parenting climb worth it.
      If I had a couple of Kairos moments, I call the day a success.
      Carpe a couple of Kairos a day.
      Good enough for me.

-Glennon Doyle Melton,  Carry On, Warrior:  The Power of Embracing Your Messy Beautiful Life