Facilitate..................................

     The way to facilitate satisfaction in relationships is lovingly to picture the best outcome.  Make sure it is mutually beneficial:  a win-win situation.   Let go of all the negative feelings and merely hold the picture in mind.  We can tell if we are really surrendered when we feel okay either way;  it's okay with us if it happens, and it's okay with us if it doesn't.  Therefore, to be surrendered does not mean to be passive.  It is being active in a positive way.
     When we are surrendered, there is no longer the pressure of time.  Frustration comes from wanting a thing now instead of letting it happen naturally in its own time.  Patience is an automatic side effect of letting go,  and we know how easy it is to get along with patient people.  Notice that patient people usually gt what they want in the end. . . .

     We think that our happiness depends on controlling events, and that facts are what upset us.  Actually, it is our feelings and thoughts about these facts that are the real cause of our upset.  Facts in and of themselves are neutral things.  The power we give them is due to our attitude of acceptance or non-acceptance and our overall feeling state.  If we get stuck in a feeling, it is because we still secretly believe that it will accomplish something for us.

-David Hawkins,  Letting Go:  The Pathway of Surrender