Remember, each individual has a choice. You are always the one in control. The cause of irritation—our notion that something is bad—that comes from us, from our labels or our expectations. Just as easily, we can change those labels; we can change our entitlement and decide to accept and love what's happening around us. And this wisdom has been repeated and independently discovered in every century and every country since time began.
-Ryan Holiday, The Daily Stoic
The first rule of a happy life is low expectations for things outside your control and high expectations for things within it. If you have high expectations for the world and no expectations for yourself, you’re going to be miserable your whole life.
It was a step in the right direction, if not the perfect solution; I did miss the orderly abundance of a fully replenished case. But the experience showed me that creativity was going to be the main ingredient in striking a true balance between restaurant-smart and corporate-smart. . . .
We threw ourselves into the project. Jon proved to be an extremely dangerous co-conspirator. For example, he found a company in Italy making amazing, tiny blue spoons. How amazing could a plastic spoon possibly be? You are going to have to trust me on this: they were paddle-shaped, extraordinarily well designed, and completely unique. They were also preposterously, heartbreakingly expensive.
But I had to have them; the Sculpture Garden deserved them. Nothing else would do.
The first time my boss saw one of those spoons, she narrowed her eyes and asked me what they had cost. I told her, and her eyes got even narrower: "We'll talk about this later." But a month later, we sat down to review the first P & L for the cart, and I never heard another word about those spoons.
I'd managed 95 percent of my budget aggressively, leveraging MoMA's brand to get excelled gelato at a steep discount, and a beautiful cart for free. I'd earned the right to splurge on those spoons, the one small detail I believed would dramatically transform the experience of getting an ice cream at the cart.
This is what I would later call the Rule of 95/5. Manage 95 percent of your business down to the penny; spend the last 5 percent "foolishly." It sounds irresponsible; in fact, it's anything but. Because that last 5 percent has an outsized impact on the guest experience, it's some of the smartest money you'll ever spend.
-Will Guidara, Unreasonable Hospitality: The Remarkable Power of Giving People More Than They Expect
When I was young, my dad gave me a paperweight that read, "What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?" That's what I was thinking about when Daniel and I wrote, "We will be Number One in the world," on a cocktail napkin. . . .
Most of the chefs on the 50 Best list had made their impact by focusing on innovation, on what needed to change. But as I thought about the impact I wanted to make, I focused on the one thing that wouldn't. Fads fade and cycle, but the human desire to be taken care of never goes away.
Daniel's food was extraordinary; he was undeniably one of the best chefs in the world. So if we could become a restaurant focused passionately, intentionally, wholeheartedly, on connection and graciousness—on giving both the people on our team and the people we served a sense of belonging—then we'd have a real shot at greatness.
-Will Guidara, Unreasonable Hospitality: The Remarkable Power of Giving People More Than They Expect
The greatest obstacle to living is expectancy, which hangs upon tomorrow, and loses today.
-attributed to Seneca
"Are you asking what the point is when it isn't a perfect straight line from goal to achievement?"
I looked at the floor. Yes. That was what I was asking. . . .
"This is the process. The process is what it is even though it doesn't always match our expectations for ourselves or the expectations others put on us. But being real about the process is the way forward. Taking one step forward and then two steps backward is not a calamity. It's the inevitable process."
"So we just expect to fail again and again?"
"Is that so bad?"
"It certainly feels bad." . . .
"Think of it in science terms, not in moral terms. Each of these attempts at the next step is an experiment. It doesn't give us victory or defeat. It gives us data. We need that data. When we reframe from 'success or failure' to 'experiment and data,' we capture the truer sense of what this is."
-Jarod K. Anderson, Something In The Woods Loves Us
................the nitty-gritty of trust:
It’s not a good idea to warily eye everyone like they’re potential contestants on “Who Wants to Betray Me Next?” Studies show expecting others to be selfish can be a self-fulfilling prophecy: “those who expect people to act selfishly, actually experience uncooperative behaviour from others more often.”
Meanwhile, displaying trust in others from the get-go can create the opposite type of self-fulfilling prophecy: people want to prove your trust in them to be justified. Research shows seemingly irrational displays of trust often prove quite rational because it leads others to trust you and not want to let you down.
Jack Levine The Feast of Pure Reason Oil 1937
The satirical direction I have chosen is an indication of my disappointment in man, which is the opposite way of saying that I have high expectations for the human race.
In truth, unrealistic expectations tarnish our appreciation of life and weigh down the buoyancy of the present moment.
But this breathtaking increase in the money supply did not, at least immediately, set off inflation. For while inflation is a monetary phenomenon, it is also a psychological one: when the expectation of inflation becomes widespread, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
That prophecy was fulfilled in 2021. With the Biden administration continuing pandemic relief, which discouraged many for seeking work, and restricting oil and gas production, inflation set in. Supply chain issues also contributed.
By December 2021, consumer prices were up seven percent on an annual basis, the highest in 40 years, while producer prices were up 9.6 percent, the highest since that statistic has been compiled. And the expectation of further inflation is now deeply embedded in the economy.
Regardless of this, the Biden administration is still pushing hard for its "Build Back Better" plan, which would add at least another $5 trillion to the national debt over the next decade. And President Biden has airily said that "Milton Friedman is no longer in charge."
But unfortunately for the Biden presidency—and for the American people—Milton Friedman was right. Create too much money and you get inflation. We are witnessing the proof of that right now.
-John Steele Gordon, as he concludes this essay
The first rule of a happy life is low expectations. If you have unrealistic expectations you’re going to be miserable your whole life. You want to have reasonable expectations and take life’s results good and bad as they happen with a certain amount of stoicism.
-Charlie Munger, as culled from here
What the patterns of an artist's progress show is the human capacity to find meaning and to make lasting work not by planning it but by remaining open to the possibilities they see inside and around themselves. This argues against forcing predetermined expectations and goals onto our experience of life and for an alert way of being, open to noticing and responding to the future as it emerges. We think ourselves efficient when we squeeze our lives into schedules, itineraries, and plans, asking of apps that they tell us what to do, where to go next. But what we lose is the freedom to notice for ourselves, to filter and reflect for ourselves, to craft our unique sense of who we are and what we wish to make of our lives.
-Margaret Heffernan, Uncharted: How To Navigate The Future
..........................Step #1 is the hard part.
Step 9. You need to set the right expectations. . . .Whatever your reasoning, just go into it with low expectations. If you surpass them, that’s icing on the cake.
"A thing that’s obvious but easily overlooked is that feeling wealthy has little to do with what you have. It’s more about the gap between what you have and what you expect. And what you expect is driven by what other people around you have."
-Morgan Housel, from this post
As they say in the twelve-step movement, "an expectation is merely a premeditated resentment." Comparison doesn't help much either. As Louis L'Amour noted, there's always a faster gun. Gratitude for what we do have is a key to power. How about we try to be worthy of what we do have?
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