We have immersed ourselves to a few mega social media platforms. Angertainment is all the rage. If you think doom scrolling, keeping up with Jones’, and entrusting your engrossment to algos designed to keep you in a constant state of anxiety is the path, have at it. Come for the social isolation and stay for the subsequent depression.
-Tony Isola, from this post
Guard your speech. Never speak of yourself, your affairs, or of anything else in a discouraged or discouraging way. Never admit the possibility of failure, or speak in a way that infers failure as a possibility. Never speak of the times as being hard, or of business conditions being doubtful. Times may be hard and business conditions doubtful for those who are on the competitive plane, but they can never be for you; you can create what you want, and you are above fear. When others are having hard times and poor business, you will find your greatest opportunities.
Train yourself to think of and to look upon the world as something which is Becoming, which is growing; and to regard seeming evil as being only that which is undeveloped. Always speak in terms of advancement; to do otherwise us to deny your faith, and to deny your faith is to lose it. Never allow yourself to feel disappointed. You may expect to have a certain thing at a certain time, and not get it at that time; and this will appear to you like failure. But if you hold to your faith you will find that the failure is only apparent. Go on in the certain way, and if you do not receive that thing, you will receive something so much better that you will see that the seeming failure was really a great success.
-Wallace D. Wattles, The Science of Getting Rich
Because the hard part of writing—the part where you wrestle with what you actually believe—that’s still 100% human.
And if you try to cheat that, you might still publish something…
But it won’t be yours.
-Mark Manson, as cut-and-pasted from here
Although we cannot dictate all the circumstances around us, there is no excuse for being unprepared or irresponsible. All too often we disregard our ability to influence the outcome because we see a situation as beyond our control. We casually dismiss our responsibility with the refrain, "It is what it is."
We need to lead. Even when circumstances feel completely beyond our control, we must still act. Only then will we be positioned to exert our influence, which will drive us closer to determining the outcome. By leading, we can overcome the feeling of victimization and, instead, understand the range of options within our power.
By taking control of our preparation, reaction, and response to problems, we become leaders. When we reframe our mindset and see situations through the lens of leadership, we understand that things don't have to remain as they are.
-Dave Berke, The Need to Lead: A TOPGUN Instructor's Lessons on How Leadership Solves Every Challenge
. . . I’m about to run into trouble, because I don’t have everything I need (the right arguments, good enough material, whatever) for the bit that’s coming next. This bothers me less than it used to, though, because again and again, the missing insight, anecdote, or angle arrives just in time. I’ll open a book at random, or hear something on a podcast, or a friend will make a comment, or I’ll notice something on a walk, and it’ll be exactly what I need for everything to fall into place. It never seems to arrive until the moment it’s required, though, so that’s more way it’s being constantly hammered home to me that trusting yourself/reality/the process is the whole game here.
-Oliver Burkeman, from this edition
We are buffeted by circumstances so long as we believe ourselves to be creatures of outside conditions; but when we realize that we are a creative power and that we may command the hidden soil and seeds of our being out of which circumstances arise, then we become the rightful masters of ourselves.
That circumstances grow out of thought, each of us, who has for any length of time practiced self-control and self-purification, knows—for we will have notices the alteration in our circumstances has been in exact ratio with our altered mental condition. So true is this that when we earnestly apply ourselves to remedy the defects in our character and make swift and marked progress, we pass rapidly through a succession of vicissitudes.
The soul attracts that which it secretly harbors, that which it loves, and also that which it fears; it reaches the height of its cherished aspirations; it falls to the level of its basest desires—and circumstances are the means by which the soul receives its own.
-James Allen, As A Man Thinketh
Don't be afraid of verbal abuse or criticism.
Only the morally weak feel compelled to defend or explain themselves to others. Let the quality of your deeds speak on your behalf. We can't control the impressions others form about us, and the effort to do so only debases our character.
So, if anyone should tell you that a particular person has spoken critically of you, don't bother with excuses or defenses. Just smile and reply, "I guess that person doesn't know about all my other faults. Otherwise he wouldn't have mentioned only these."
-Attributed to Epictetus, from A Manual for Living
Self-care creates impact.
Your body and mind are the most valuable tools you have to produce anything. Neglecting them puts a ceiling on everything else.
-Shane Parrish, from this edition
In cultivating loving-kindness, we train first to be honest, loving, and compassionate toward ourselves. Rather than nurturing self-denigration, we begin to cultivate a clear-seeing kindness. Sometimes we feel good and strong. Sometimes we feel inadequate and weak. But our loving-kindness is unconditional. No matter how we feel, we can aspire to be happy. We can learn to act and think in ways that sow seeds of our future well-being, gradually becoming more aware of what causes happiness as well as what causes distress. Without loving-kindness for ourselves it is difficult, if not impossible, to genuinely feel it for others.
That's why having a strong sense of identity is important because everyday the world will try to convince you into being somebody you're not. Authenticity leads to divine order & success.
..........................visits the self-help trap.
Along the way, he suggests Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs
should actually be Maslow's Hamburger of Needs.
..................worth the read.
When stakes are low, possibility is our playground. Curiosity is our guide. Mistakes are data. And the real reward is in watching yourself evolve.
-Tanmay Vora, from here
.............................................but:
Control what you can. Read widely the best literature for wisdom and comfort. Listen to the best music for mood management. Shop locally, enjoy cooking and eat well. Spend time with those who listen, support and create.
And walk daily, the greatest distance you can.
The first rule of a happy life is low expectations for things outside your control and high expectations for things within it. If you have high expectations for the world and no expectations for yourself, you’re going to be miserable your whole life.
To a disciple who was forever complaining about others the Master said, "If it is peace you want, seek to change yourself, not other people. It is easier to protect your feet with slippers than to carpet the whole of the earth."
-Anthony de Mello, One Minute Wisdom
. . . there are three main avenues on which one arrives at meaning in life. The first is by creating a work or by doing a deed. The second is by experiencing something or encountering someone; in other words, meaning can be found not only in work but also in love. . . .
The most important, however, is the third avenue to meaning in life: even the helpless victim of a hopeless situation, facing a fate he cannot change, may rise above himself, may grow beyond himself, and by so doing change himself. He may turn a personal tragedy into a triumph.
-Viktor Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning
My soul preached to me and said, "Do not be delighted because of praise, and do not be distressed because of blame."
Ere my soul counselled me, I doubted the worth of my work.
Now I realize that the trees blossom in Spring and bear fruit in Summer without seeking praise; and they drop their leaves in Autumn and become naked in Winter without fearing blame.
Kahlil Gibran, Thoughts and Mediations
My life improved dramatically when I stopped sacrificing myself in an effort to meet the narratives that other people had about me.
-Sahil Bloom, from today's episode
The safety instructions the flight attendant delivers before takeoff are clear: "Put your own oxygen mask on first before assisting others." But when you're in the hospitality industry, that instruction can feel counterintuitive. Aren't we supposed to put others first and attend to them before we attend to ourselves?
The answer is no. If you aren't tending to your own needs, you can't help those around you. Pride and ambition motivated us to push—to tweak, to optimize, to work harder, demanding more of ourselves and those around us every day. But you can't pour endlessly from your own pitcher without ever stopping to refill it.
-Will Guidara, Unreasonable Hospitality: The Remarkable Power of Giving People More Than They Expect
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